Category: My Life As A Voyeur: Living Vicariously

Here’s a riddle. What is something that will happen to everyone, is fought tooth and nail by some, but to many it is a relief? It’s death, the only thing in life that is a certainty. But to those left behind it can be more upsetting than an audit.

My cousin Wendy called recently to tell me she would be in town for the funeral of a friend. Since another friend of mine also had a recent death in her family and I was unable to attend the service, I decided to attend this viewing with my cousin. It seemed a way of trying to pay my respects to both with one service, I guess.

Ever since my favorite shows went into reruns, I’ve been spending more time with the telescope. Scored big with it Friday night. I was scanning the windows across the street when I hit on an apartment with lights on and the blinds open just enough.

What’s this, I thought, I think I see movement. So I focus a little closer. Sure enough, the telltale shadow of a female form. As I stare at the unknown woman I realize she’s just come out of the shower, a towel wrapped around her and her hair up like a turban.

I ran into my quirky neighbor today, the one who lives two doors down from me. I was getting my mail from downstairs and discovered one of her letters had been tucked in with my mail. Rather than go all the way back downstairs, I knocked on her door.

“Why Cole, how nice to see you,” Felicia said, opening the door.

I’m sitting here facing the worst thing in my life. A deadline. OK I guess maybe there are worse things in my life than deadlines, but my editor wants me to write something. I hate it when my mind is a blank. No flexibility, no understanding about the three margaritas I put away last night in the name of “research”.